Leaving

Raising a child like Ari comes with its own set of duties. Every conversation is a study of existential responsibilities. I’ve known, always she is a special child and my greatest job is to deliver her to adulthood her gifts from the Universe intact and untainted. No pressure right.

Sometimes I wish we could have a conversation without it needing to be a lesson in how the world works and how it can be made better. She’s a serious child and my job of being her mother, deadly serious. I feel deep in my bones the future of the world or even just one individual who’s life she will change is at stake.

Recently my sweet kid changed schools. Being a uniquely soulful being she is still sad, so broken to have left her beautiful Nicho behind.

It’s hard explaining to her why I had to make the decision to take her away from her two very best friends who will be in her life forever that I know.
Two boys who share her creative mind and who’s games haven’t been the same since she’s been gone.

This is an extract of our conversation.

Ever since you we were born, before even, I knew you had a gift. Somehow you would change the world. The more I get to know you the surer I am. You will lead, you will invent or you will write something so amazing it will imprint on history forever. Of all my three children this is your path.

As your mother it is my job to give you every opportunity to make sure that happens. Your time at Nicho was to enfold you in its shield of love, nurturing and to create a big fish within a small environment.

It’s gift to you will remain within your heart forever but you had stopped growing. It was time to move on.

Now you are at a much larger school, a centre of excellence in academic achievement and I need you to give it a chance. Allow it to find its way into your soul.

You will always remember Miss Miller, and what she taught you. To try everything, never settle on a career until you are completely fulfilled, to be kind and loving always.

When you are twenty eight or thirty eight I will remind you of this conversation and again beg your forgiveness for breaking your tiny (huge) heart but I will ask you if I made the right choice for you my love. A girl that is so far already along her path that it makes me question my entire life led so far.

There’s so much hope riding on your little shoulders dear heart, my job is to help you bear it. Sometimes that hurts me more than you can ever imagine. I ask you to place your trust in me. I don’t ask it lightly and I feel the heavy weight of responsibility. Let me help you fly.

 

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